This May Be the End of My Substack?

My stripe account is on hold

Photo by Iluha Zavaley on Unsplash

Hey all,

First, let me say how sorry I am that things have gone down this way and for not being around. I haven’t published in forever and that’s my fault. I got really burnt out, and sick with COVID, so I decided to take a break so I could come back stronger than ever. That’s when the nightmare began.

I’m currently under review by Stripe payment processors and I may have to find a new payment system or figure something else out if I want to continue this. I’m not sure if I even can. I don’t have the slightest clue how. Maybe I can rely on donations or something? Bitcoin? I have no idea. All payments were suspended. I figured everyone would have canceled anyway when I took my break. Substack has been great to me. They’ve given me a place to write without having to look over my shoulder, wondering if I’m going to say the wrong thing. That’s how I felt the whole time on Medium. But, Stripe halted all my payments and my account is under review, I’m assuming it’s because of my content.

I’ve been so heartbroken words can’t even describe it. Hopefully, everything works out, but I really worry it won’t. It’s so frustrating how we have to deal with this all the time. I’ve heard horror stories over the years. I have so much to say I could pour out my heart right now, but I won’t dump all my sadness on you here. I’ll endure it and, you know what, maybe I should feel it. The guilt and sadness are beyond words, so I’m sure I’d just rant a bunch of meaningless jibberish anyway.

I was in the process of writing a lot of content for you guys when this mess happened. I’ll keep you updated and will let you know what happens.

They say I should know sometime in the next couple of weeks. For those of you who didn’t immediately cancel your subscriptions, thank you so much for sticking with me and I’m going to write some stuff just in case they decide in my favor. Speaking of, I asked someone how I can pause payments and I’m going to do that right now so you won’t be charged under any circumstances until this blows over just in case.

I’ll upload some of my latest writing for free soon to make up for my absence and give you all something to read in the meantime in case I get something else figured out, or in case everything is okay and they freaked me out for no reason. Keep your eye out for new stuff coming soon. Hopefully I can find the strength to publish something, but this has really taken the wind out of my sails.

Sad and hoping for the best,
Nicole